Sudden Fiction – by Scott Chretien

Fiction, Flash Fiction

                Late one night she walked up to my car and just stood there and didn’t say a word. The sky was clear and stars were everywhere you looked as the darkness seems to be only in my mind as I wondered what she wanted. Although I wanted to ask her what she wanted I was unable to. What was I to say? Forget about how my emotions can take me to what used to be between us, I need to know why she’s here tonight, this night, this place. 

Part of me wanted to dance as if the very stars that were lighting up her sexy pale skin were fallen upon us in a rain of stars and light. I had to stay strong as this most “Beautiful” woman stood in front of me and had not said a word as if she could not speak or mumble or gesture and it made me wonder as to what I should do. I feared that if I spoke my words first I would say all the wrong things and push her away again as I had before.

                I’m lost in her beauty and lost in my own emotions as 20 minutes have past without a single word from either one of us. For minutes at a time we would gaze into each others eyes and I would have flash backs to what was once was the most life-changing relationship but I must hold back the tears for I have already shed a lifetime’s worth in just over a year and a half as I waited for her to say something.

                The sun is rising to the east and bouncing off the lake to my right as a smooth warm breeze floats past us both as we take two steps closer to each other and without any words spoken we hugged six hours to the minute from when we met at that park, smiled and got in to our car, looked at each other, smiled again then waved and then both said through the closed glass “I STILL LOVE YOU…GOODBYE FOREVER”  I didn’t hear her words but I saw them that night.


2 thoughts on “Sudden Fiction – by Scott Chretien

  1. I like the flow of this – it has the spontaneous feel of a sudden fiction piece, but the pace also fits this guy’s state. Some great lines in that last paragraph – the kind of thing I find happens when I let my mind go.

  2. Pulp City, thank you for the kind words. Everything I write is with emotion. I did not title this but if i had it would be “Silent Goodbye”.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s